back at work, incorporating these new ones into the ones i already have. this morning a new category emerged, distinct from 'helplessness' and 'dissatisfaction with the place,' which i already had. it seems to be a kind of martyr-ish drama/self-pity. i went back through them all and selected these:
I’ve made a lot of mistakes and they’re my fault.
If I sit it’ll be all over.
I haven’t gotten the check. I haven’t gotten any checks. I wrote to them, three times already.
It’s tough when you know what’s out there, and all you can do is look.
I’m always on the wrong side.
I missed the announcement.
It’s not my fault, it’s the city’s fault.
No one had any idea what I was talking about.
Can’t be worse than mine.
I already waited in this line.
Now I know how a sardine feels.
No, I’m just delusional, I’m not rich.
I don’t do anything to it, it just comes out like this.
They used to give you a paper bag with a sandwich and an apple, and that was the beginning of the end.